Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.