why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny