im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize
