He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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