just come out here and I will go home with you...
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
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