your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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