Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
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