Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Randomize
