where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
We need to get me chipped asap
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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