Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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