hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
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