I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Randomize
