I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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