Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
