I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize