You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize