I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize
