I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Randomize