Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Randomize