so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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