omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
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