Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
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