I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
