woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
only if we run a train.
done.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize