i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
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