I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
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We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
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Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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