And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
She's like a pop up book from hell.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
