i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
