I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize