Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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