My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
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