If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize
