Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
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