I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ðŸ˜ðŸ’€#pensacolaproblems
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
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