I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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