The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
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