windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
