also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Randomize