tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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