That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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