help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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