I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Come on in and take your pants off
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