oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
