hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
she smelled like a LAN party
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
