I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
