Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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