operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize