is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize