exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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