Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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