when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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